Gigi Goes to Prison

As we waited for the ferry to take us to Alcatraz Island I saw this banner –

“Rule 5. You are entitled to food, clothing, shelter and medical attention. Anything else that you get is a privilege. You earn your privileges by conducting yourself properly."

I love having my three granddaughters stay with me for a week of Camp Gigi (which is what they call me). I fix kid-friendly meals (i.e. mac-n-cheese and a minimum of veggies) bake their favorite cookies, and stock a freezer-full of frozen treats. We go to movies, museums, have tea parties, and at the very least go swimming every day. I do everything for them and expect little in return.
As they reach the age of sassiness, bickering, and complaining, it occurs to me that I am not preparing them to be productive members of society. Instead a sense of entitlement is being created. Don't you love being around people with a strong sense of entitlement? Whining, ungrateful people who don't take responsibility for their own happiness? Yeah, me neither. I know that's not what their parents are hoping for when they send them to Camp Gigi.
Maybe the way to eliminate that issue is to introduce more structure and a system of rewards or privileges. I believe if the children know what is expected of them they will rise to the challenge. I adapted the Rule & Regulations of Alcatraz and came up with the following:
RULES AND REGULATIONS OF CAMP GIGI 2012
RULE NO. 1
You are entitled to food, clothing, shelter and medical attention. Anything else you get is a privilege. You earn your privileges by conducting yourself properly.
RULE NO. 2
You are required to work at whatever you are told to do.
By doing good work on your assignments you earn privileges and/or pay for movies, museum visits, horseback riding lessons, cooking lessons, and time for recreation, i.e. bowling, swimming or going to the batting cages.
RULE NO. 3
Complaints for the purpose of creating dissatisfaction and/or stirring up trouble; or if you agitate your roommates into trouble, you will be subject to disciplinary action and loss of privileges (See Rule No. 1).
DAILY ROUTINE
8:00 A.M. – Morning wake up.
Dress, brush teeth and hair, make-up bed and prepare room for inspection.
In order to pass bedroom inspection all books and toys should be place in their receptacles; clothes should be hung or folded and properly stored. Bed should be made in a tight and orderly manner.
To pass bathroom inspection: towels should be hung up; toothbrush and toothpaste placed in the designated drawer, and sink wiped of toothpaste residue.
A laundry basket will be made available for all dirty clothes and towels. You will be instructed on the washing and folding of all clothing.
8:30 A.M. – Stand by your bedroom door, facing out, remain there until room has been inspected. (Ok, we might not make them stand outside the door).
8:40 A.M. – Breakfast will be served.
9:00 A.M. – Clear table of all used dishes, rinse and place in dishwasher
9:05 A.M. – Return to table for morning devotional
9:15 A.M. – Work detail assignments will be given
9:30 A.M. – If all work is completed without argument or complaint, a privilege for the day will be announced.
3:00 P.M. – Reading and quiet time
4:00 P.M. – Arts and crafts time
5:00 P.M. – Begin meal preparation as instructed
5:30 P.M. – Dinner. Be prepared to share a good memory of the day
6:00 P.M. – Clear table of all used dishes, rinse and place in dishwasher

6:05 P.M. – Calls home will be allowed. Correspondence to parents encouraged.

6:30 P.M. – Free time for movies or games

8:00 P.M. – Bath time

8:30 P.M. – Evening devotional, songs and prayer.

9:00 P.M. – Lights out.

You will note there is very little work time carved out in relation to hours of entertainment. I was a little afraid  of two things: the parents would balk at the rules and structure; or the girls would not want to come. No fear. The parents are thrilled they won't have to retrain the girls when they come home. I could even say they are grateful to have the assistance. We are on the same team after all. The girls are still excited about our special time together. They just wish we had two weeks. 

Grandparents.com is a great resource
for everything from coloring pages
to kid-friendly meals.

I’ll let you know at the end of the summer how my experiment works.

"Discipline your children; you'll be glad you did -- they'll turn out delightful to live with." Prov. 29:17 The Message

When Things Go Bad

Oh, the strawberries, blueberries and blackberries look so tempting. I load up my grocery cart. I plan to eat them for breakfast, lunch and dinner. By the end of the week I'm haunted by the sight of moldy berries and brown bananas sitting on my counter.  Then I hear mother's voice ciding me for wasting food and pleading on behalf of the starving children in China.
 I sleep easier now that I found this simple yummy recipe. You can substitute any berry you can salvage.
Strawberry-Banana Bread
1/2 c. shortening (part butter)
1 c. sugar
2 eggs
1½ tsp. vanilla
1 1/3 c. flour
1 tsp. baking powder
½ tsp. salt
1 c. fresh strawberries, diced
2 ripe bananas, mashed
½ c. chopped pecans
Cream shortening, butter, and sugar. Add eggs, one at a time beating until fluffy. Add vanilla. Sift dry ingredients together and slowly add to creamed mixture. Fold strawberries and bananas into batter and add nuts.
Pour into loaf pans that have been greased and floured. Bake at 350 degrees for 1 hour (large loaf) or 30 minutes for 4 small loaves. A toothpick stuck in the middle should come out clean when they are done. Loaves should be nicely browned.

Dice salvaged strawberries and
break up pecans



Mash bananas



Cream shortening, butter and sugar.
Add eggs, one at a time. Add vanilla
Sift together dry ingredients and slowly add to creamed mixture.
Fold in berries and bananas. Add nuts

 

Pour into greased and floured pans.
Bake at 350 for 30 minutes (4 small loaves)
or 1 hour (large loaf).

 



Enjoy!

Fifty Gray Hairs

“My friend said she is reading the best book ever. Fifty Gray Hairs or something like that. Have you heard of it?”


“Mom, you mean Fifty Shades of Grey,” She laughed. Yeah, all my friends are reading it.”

“Have you read it?” I asked.

“No, you know I don’t have time to read. They call it ‘Mommy Porn’,” she responded still laughing.

“Reeaally? I raised my eyebrow and grinned. “Maybe, in the interest of staying current, I should check it out.”

It didn’t take me long to find the books at Target. My mouth dropped open when I saw the words “Adult Erotica” below the synopsis. Huh, at Target? Surely it couldn’t be too bad. They don’t carry porn. I skimmed a few pages and put it back on the shelf.

When I go on a diet I purge the pantry and fridge of any refined sugar. If it’s in the house I’m going to eat it. I know myself. I’m weak, so I get rid of temptation. Books like Fifty Shades of Grey are my brain candy. My temptation is to fantasize. Sweetheart travels and I get lonely. The last thing I need is to be lonely and…how can I say this…stirred up. Sweetheart can’t live up to fiction any more than I can live up to an airbrushed Playboy model. I made a commitment to be faithful to him. Am I being faithful if I’m daydreaming about someone else? Is it respectful to him? The best way to avoid temptation is to run in the opposite direction. I learned the hard way.

I cheated the first time around. I could give you multiple reasons for my unhappy marriage, but they are not relevant. An affair didn’t just happen. (Anyone who says an affair just happens is full of poop.) It wasn’t an accidental kiss which led to more. I made a choice to be unfaithful long before the first kiss.

My best friend, at the time, encouraged me to find a boyfriend. She said I was unrealistic to expect one man to meet all my needs. She was in the middle of an affair herself. Her busy husband worked and went to school fulltime. He had neither the time nor energy for her needs. Her boyfriend took her to dinner and lavished attention on her, but she always went home to the security of her husband.

I bought into the idea. I wanted to stay married for the sake of my seven-month-old daughter. What a great plan. My needs could be met and I could stay married. So let the games begin!

When you open yourself up to the possibility of an affair, I guarantee you it will happen. It doesn’t matter how old you are, what you look like, or how much you weigh. Don't think you are exempt because you are "a good Christian" girl. Someone will accept what you are offering. Not the milkman maybe, but probably someone you already know. Odds are you see him at work every day. You are aware of the chemistry between you. You flirt a little and enjoy his response. When the whole office goes to lunch you sit with him to carry on your own conversation. Soon the two of you begin to have lunch alone, so you can talk without interruption. Next thing you know you find excuses to work late. You miss the bus, and he offers you a ride home. He stands behind you in the elevator. When you feel his breath on your neck, you turn to look him in the eyes. He wraps his arms around you and kisses you deeply. You accept his kiss and all that it means.

“Look, we’re both married and have children. We want to stay married. Let’s agree we are in this for pleasure. I don’t want to break up any marriages,” I said.

Surprised he pulled away. “You’re very open, aren’t you?”

“Yes, I am.” I said. “I want to be clear. I’m not happy at home, but I don’t want a divorce. Let’s just have fun.”

We did have fun for a year. The excitement and anticipation of each encounter was exhilarating. I lost weight feeding on the adrenaline rush. He treated me better than I had ever been treated. I fell in love with him. He broke my heart. This was neither his first affair nor his last.

I didn’t get caught in my infidelity, but there are consequences even if you don’t get caught. I no longer listened to my husband’s dinner conversation. I daydreamed about my last rendezvous or plotted the next. My husband suffered in every comparison to my lover. I detested him for being oblivious to my blatant cheating. My heart was torn apart. Instead of repairing the marriage the affair drove a wedge to the base of our union.

I quit my job and moved away to give my marriage a fighting chance. I went for counseling alone. My husband wouldn’t go because as he put it, “I’m not the one trying to break up nine years of marriage. You get your stuff together and we’ll be fine.” Hope for a healthy marriage died. I knew I would always cheat on him. I contemplated suicide but couldn’t leave my daughter. So I left him, but not for the other man. I left him because I couldn’t stand the liar and deceiver I had become.

When God commanded me not to commit adultery, His intent was not to curtail my fun. He was trying to protect me. When I divorced I made myself a promise to remain single unless I could be faithful to my spouse. I planned to raise my daughter and live alone. I remarried 28 wonderful years ago. I have kept my promise, but I am always on guard against temptation.

Hope you can learn from my mistake.

Meal in a Basket

On Marilyn's first night home from the hospital, her husband gave her a granola bar for dinner. An intervention was staged on her behalf by the Bible Study Girls. I recruited my BFF to help me take two meals. BFF doesn't cook, but she's pretty handy with a credit card. She purchased a gift card to Marilyn's favorite restaurant. (One only needs so many casserole dishes in the fridge). 

The Tomato Basil Soup was already made, so my part was equally easy. I bought a loaf of French bread, bagged salad, light dressing, and fresh strawberries. To add color to the salad, I included fresh cucumber, yellow squash, and a tomato from another friend's garden. 

I could have stopped there, but having a sweet tooth myself, I decided to make this easy three ingredient Marshmallow Creme Dip. Combine a jar of marshmallow creme and 8 oz. whipped cream cheese. Beat until smooth. Add 1/2 tsp. almond flavoring. Serve with any kind of fruit or angel food cake or both! Yum!

When I take a meal to a friend, I don't want them to worry about returning dishes.  So, how should I package this meal? I had flowers from the grocery store, leftover paper shreds and a basket from Easter, a pint-size mason jar, and a roll of wired ribbon. I put a bow on the jar, plopped in the flowers, and tucked it in the corner of the basket. As a finishing touch I wrapped the basket handle with ribbon. It turned out like this,



Super easy. Marilyn can use the basket or pass it on.

If my husband saw this meal he would say, "Where's the meat?" BFF bought a roast chicken from the grocery store for the granola-feeding husband. A funny get-well card and a short visit completed our gift.

Proverbs 17:22 says, "A happy heart is good medicine and a cheerful mind works healing, but a broken spirit dries up the bones." AMP. Go forth and cheer!